How To Annoy Percy Jackson: 101
by ParTea
Summary: The Greek Gods are bored, so they decide to go to high school. Because come on, they can't possibly stay on Mt. Olympus all the time. So off they go, on a quest to discover the mysteries of the world of modern-day teenagers.
1. Chapter 1: Zeus is Bored

p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="48c056b66a2e3261c5f726388175c343"Zeus was having a bad day. The WiFi was down so he couldn't watch his favourite shows on Netflix, Hera was mad at him for some reason or another, and the weather was forecasted to be stormy today, so he had to keep the skies clear, just to prove the forecast wrong. He was bored out of his mind. He shifted on his throne, trying to find a comfortable position, all the while playing with his master bolt, ready to smite someone. There was always someone in need of a smiting./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="26deec8ee1a6113b156d4e180833ecbc"He groaned and rubbed the bridge of his nose, thinking of ways to entertain himself. Should he call Apollo? He was always very amusing. But no, Apollo was off doing who-knows-what, possibly frolicking with some other mortal./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="ab28048fbceea54f26b15c1411f1950e"He would get Hermes, but Hermes was trying to fix the WiFi while George and Martha argued between themselves. It was quite entertaining to watch, actually, seeing Hermes try fruitlessly to ignore the incessant bickering of the two surprisingly loud snakes. But it got boring after a while. /p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="053495218be6fbe5ebd5795d8eb37cf9"Hephaestus was working on his latest trap for his wife and Ares, so he wasn't available. Artemis was sharpening her arrows, preparing for another hunt. Demeter was mourning the loss of her daughter since it was winter, and she got grumpy when someone interrupted her. Aphrodite and Ares were off somewhere, probably making out in some abandoned closet. Poseidon was being Poseidon, talking to fish, making waves, y'know, the usual. And Hades. Don't get started on Hades. That good-for-nothing swine, being a miserable old bum, most likely plotting a way to take Zeus' throne with Poseidon. Stupid brothers./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="f13c0720bae9dd7237a204f5a7abe04a"Zeus brightened up. Athena! She wasn't doing anything important, and as his favourite daughter, she would most definitely think of a way to cure his boredom. He took a deep breath./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="66bd0329ff8ba0e4205cd582c9c5d1c5""span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold;"ATHENA!/span" Zeus bellowed, cracks appearing in the walls with each syllable. "span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold;"COME! I NEED YOU./span" With that, there was a bright light and Athena appeared, in all her war armour glory. She glared at Zeus./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="b307c741f2c065b03fee8bba6af7ef22""I was in the middle of something emspan style="box-sizing: border-box;"very/span/emspan style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold;" /spanimportant." she snapped, clearly angered at the interruption. Zeus snorted./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="cccf12837884a892560b4f2dd03b1f87""You were probably crying over an image of Augustus Waters." Athena visibly stiffened, meaning that Zeus was correct. He smirked./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="1cd89952b8cf449630bbfb86e96b4224""Seeing as you're not doing anything remotely life-changing-" he paused dramatically, twirling his bolt to illustrate his point- "I need you to think of something for us to do otherwise I'll die of boredom." He finished lamely. Athena rolled her eyes, obviously not amused by the fact that her father was whining like a child./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="bc0da22b4e4caac21c9725c68f3125dd""You could go bother the demigods and leave me alone. I'm sure Percy-" Zeus jumped up, a grin on his face as an idea hit him./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="d0cc4022a5ca4341c23a275587ef60e0""Percy! That's it! I could go bother Perseus Jackson! I am such a genius!"/p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="3a381a218f42ff92b7febfeb3b3f65da""That's what I just said," Athena grumbled. "But sure." Zeus waved a dismissive hand, grinning like a maniac. He turned to Athena, who gave him a sceptical thumbs up, then disappeared with a crash of thunder and some lightning bolts thrown in for dramatic purposes. Athena ran a hand down her tired face at her father's theatrics and returned to the library./p 


	2. Chapter 2: Percy is Annoyed

Percy was in detention. His calculus teacher was tiny, old, devilish thing, and she hated teenagers. She treated them like vermin. And one thing she did not tolerate, not at all, was tardiness. She detested it. Because of that, she hated a certain fellow named Percy Jackson.

Every time Percy failed to show up on time to her class, she would point a bony finger at him.

"Mister Jackson, do you have a problem with arriving on time to my class?" she would snarl, a sour expression on her face. Despite her small stature, she still managed to look down on him, and Percy, who would be panting on his knees, would secretly wonder if she was a Fury in disguise. And every time, Percy would shake his head hurriedly, not wanting the same thing to repeat itself.

"No ma'am, I'm sorry, it won't happen again." he would say, pasting a what he hoped was a sincere smile on his face. And every time, she would hand him a small pink slip, and he would groan and fall into his seat.

And every afternoon, after school, he would find himself in a room full of delinquents throwing paper at each other.

Every. Single. Time.

A ball of wadded up paper hit Percy in the back of his head, and he turned around in his seat, glaring at the culprit. A boy twice his size gulped, slowly turning his head to avoid Percy's piercing stare. Percy harrumphed, satisfied with the reaction and turned back around in his seat, only to release a high pitch yelp of surprise.

Because sitting on his table, picking at his nails, was none other than Zeus himself.

Percy scrambled back, a cry of surprise leaving his open mouth as his chair tipped backwards and hit the floor. He climbed back up, clutching his throbbing head and glared at Zeus, who was still sitting on the table, blinking innocently down at him. Percy opened his mouth to shout at him, only realising that the normally rowdy detention room was still. He glanced around, finding all the students staring at him suspiciously, not knowing the reason for his unexpected, um, performance, courtesy of the Mist. Percy chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of his neck, uprighting his chair and sitting down awkwardly. He folded his arms and gave Zeus a look.

"What are you doing here?" he whispered out of the side of his mouth, hoping no one noticed and thought he was a crack-o. They probably already did, though. Zeus glanced at him as if only realising he was there and went right back to cleaning his nails. Percy groaned under his breath.  
"I said, what are you doing here? I'm at school! If you need something, can't it wait?" he said through gritted teeth, not making eye contact with Zeus.

Zeus paused for a moment, looking at Percy thoughtfully.

"School?" he said, brow furrowed as if he was solving a particularly hard problem.

"Yeah, high school, where teenagers are forced to go to receive an education so they aren't completely stupid. It's also known as living hell." Percy rolled his eyes.

"Yes, sea-spawn, I understand the concept of this, school, you speak of. However, why don't mortals enjoy it? It is where they congregate, no?" Zeus quipped. "Wait, don't answer. I'm thinking." His face smoothened out, and he suddenly grinned down at Percy.

Percy frowned, taken aback by Zeus' sudden mood change. He shook his head, watching as Zeus waved at him.

"Well, toodle-oo, I must be off. Lot's of important things to do." And with that, he started glowing. Percy covered his eyes, and when he felt it was safe to look, Zeus had vanished. He shook his head and relaxed in his seat, shaking off the nagging feeling that something strange was going to happen.


	3. Chapter 3: The Gods Make a Decision

p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="80224db06be350234ee47184bf4a3828"Zeus appeared in the throne room of Mt. Olympus with a big smile on his face and cupped his hands around his mouth./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="f29bc27bcf34018e094476d81ab5c4e7""WE'RE ALL GOING TO SCHOOL!" he announced, walking to his throne. He counted to three in his head and grinned when the twelve Olympians appeared in the throne room one-by-one, disbelief evident on their faces. They started arguing immediately, each voicing their opinions in their own way. After the third broken vase, Zeus had had enough. He held his hands up dramatically, waiting for the silence that didn't come. He frowned, deciding that drastic measures needed to be taken, so he summoned a lightning bolt and grunted with satisfaction as he watched the now silenced gods turn to glare him, their hair standing on end from the static. Zeus cleared his throat./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="19a865c33e6a608eecb1ed6530861abb""As I said, we will all be attending the place the mortals call em style="box-sizing: border-box;"school/em," he said, twirling his master bolt around in his hands. "No arguments, we are doing it because I want to. Any questions?" The other Olympians' hand shot up. "Questions with no sarcasm, or screaming, or arguments." Their hands lowered, almost reluctantly. Zeus nodded when suddenly an idea hit him. "And Hades will be joining us. Hestia too." /p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="d9909da3549688eb983641bcd753159e"Hestia was sitting in the corner, tending to the hearth, and her head snapped up at the mention of her name. She gasped in surprise, pointing to herself, her eyes darting around the room for confirmation, smiling happily when she received it. /p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="25f0d3e7a6304f1ed91e894bc5400924""We will be enrolling in different schools because I can't stand being in the same place as you. Now shoo, start preparing. We start tomorrow. Someone tell Hades, and if he refuses, tell him he doesn't have a choice, otherwise, I will put that video of him singing to Beyonce on YouTube." And with that, Zeus flashed out of the room. /p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="8a7ab20ec0ab3262ce329c7dcb399a4e"***/p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="550e13a8c5013df6c3527b9b8d14eee9"The next day, all the gods were prepared for their trip to the mortal world. All the gods that is, except for Apollo. His excuse was that he was busy last night./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="d415c898e46b32338cccd3223c5d86e7""No matter, I will just enrol in the school of Perseus Jackson."/p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="aacb0a10885b36fa3aca23f0a289e603"Cries of protest rang round the room, Zeus' being the loudest./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="9f7bb68b2aaef80177ae787ffb33eabe""You can't do that! That's my school!" he said, frowning. The remainder of the gods stared at him, with the exception of Hades who was sulking in the corner. /p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="5a9a4ceaae11ab7c6e93d3972fbca817""Wait, did all of you decide on that school as well?" he said nervously, glancing around the room./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="f1bdd7d420d2112d66cbfe7dbb78e267"And the gods all nodded. /p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="9ede290142361398ad6f821d76a2f425""Oh, come on. Didn't I tell you specifically to enrol in different schools? Knuckleheads." Zeus whined, the air around him crackling with static electricity. He sighed. It was too late to enrol in different schools now, they would just have to make do./p  
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; color: #555555;" data-p-id="136dcf496d6904d94a3364a55a8c03ff""Right. Let's go," he said, sighing as he watched the other gods and goddesses glamour themselves into teenage mortals. He watched as they walked towards the elevator, knowing that their cover would be blown if they teleported to the school instead. So off he went, with his new identity, to his new school./p  
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End file.
